A blog dedicated to fictional short stories and role-playing across a spectrum of video-games and fantasy worlds.

Saturday, May 12, 2012

Journal of Exile, Entry 2

I made a friend today. Possibly the only person who would still consider me worthy of friendship, a person who is understanding itself, compassion embodied. I did not expect it, but after spending some time amongst the books in the great library within Shattrath, I decided to take a walk and get some fresh air. I'd been studying some texts and reading a romance novel and thought a walk would do me good. It has done so much more than that.

I was hesitant at first to approach the Naaru known as A'dal. His power is something that laps against me like the waves in the ocean. I can feel its brilliant heat against my skin, and it terrifies and thrills me at the same time. His voice is what first drew me. It is as if the purest music was being played, and I could not help but to go and seek out its source. When I found him and beheld him for the first time, I did not want to approach, but he spoke to me, and beckoned me to him.

At first our conversation was mundane, if speaking to a Naaru can be considered mundane! He asked me of my stay in the city, and how I was getting along with the people here. I answered his questions, though I'm sure he knew the answers before even asking. I realize now he was letting me speak, letting me get my thoughts in order so that I could understand my own feelings.

Our conversation turned to my reasons for coming. I told him of the hatred and anger of my friends and loved ones, I told him of my fears for my people, and in return, he explained something to me that I will think about for a long time to come. After I had explained myself, he asked me a question that seemed off base. He asked me what love is.

It took me long to answer him. I told him that love is giving of yourself to another, it is caring for another person and wanting to see them grow and prosper. It is believing in them. In reply, he asked me why I thought I was hated, why I thought people like Kyliska and Chalce no longer loved me, and images formed in my mind.

I saw Kyliska, standing again by the statue of my father. Instead of hearing her words and feeling anger towards her though, I saw in my vision the look on her face. The look of sorrow, of disappointment in me. Not anger. Not hate. She was hurt because she cared, not because she wished to drive me away. A similar image of Chalce came to mind. Of her goading words that I see now were not designed to be venomous barbs, but were directed at me to try and show me her point of view, to show me that she was worried about the path I tread. Her actions towards me, even her striking me, were not hatred. No, they were frustration with me for taking such a dangerous path when she cared so deeply for me.

I was stunned to see these things from another perspective. My heart aches even now to realize how much I've hurt them, how disappointed they are. I must admit that I wept openly in front of A'dal and all of the others near him, but I was not judged for this. Instead, he offered me comfort and the wisdom to know that the visions I had seen were a lesson to consider.

I will sit and consider this for a long time to come. Perhaps I myself have judged too harshly the actions of those who only care for me and wish to see me prosper. Perhaps my own actions have been detrimental to the love I feel for them. Maybe...maybe I should have looked first at what they wanted, what would make them happy, before I stood in their path.

I will contemplate this.

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