Introspection

The sun shone down brightly, no clouds in the mid-day sky to darken the grass around her feet as Biara walked slowly towards the shrine. Built of stone and lovingly carved and enchanted, the tribute to Dath'remar always had an eerie feeling of magic about it, and as always it made Biara's senses tingle as she approached it.

It had been some time since she'd last been to Sunstrider Isle, but she needed to spend some time alone, and going to any of the places she usually frequented would just invite interruption and, possibly, more arguments and yelling. She'd had enough of them to last a lifetime it seemed, and she couldn't stand to hear any more for the time being.

As the Magistrix walked up to the shrine, she slowly reached out, placing a hand on the smooth surface of the stone, feeling the radiating power of the shrine. Like a balm, it soothed her and supported her as she leaned against it, her fingers idly tracing the memorial carved into the side of the structure.

"I wonder," she said quietly. "I wonder if you had the same doubts, the same detractors and arguments thrown your way? You too delved into power that had become forbidden, and you lead our people to a glorious future. But there was hardship too, wasn't there? It was such a difficult choice to make. How did you do it? How did you stand in the face of the accusations, how did you stay strong and to your course?"

The stone gave her no response, and Biara sighed and slowly sank down, sitting with her back against it, feeling its energy radiating through her spine. She didn't expect an answer, but it was good sometimes to speak the questions aloud to hear them and understand them better.

A final thought filtered through her mind and came out, hanging on the air. "How did you know your course was the right one?"

Her fel green eyes closed as she heard the voices of people she respected whispering to her again.

"There doesn't seem to be any point in attacking uninvolved towns and people. That just pokes the beehive and makes even more people desire revenge on you...You have determined only you know best for our people, and you will do as you will do," Jenuila's voice seemed to whisper. 

"It hurts me to admit I was a fool. But I am a fool in love with a mad woman. And if that insults you, then show me you are not a mad woman and that I am not a fool to hope for peace," Makaelen's written words burned in her mind's eye.

"You didn't have to do what you did! She was retired and unable to even defend herself! Was carving your name into her needed?! Was sticking that horrible crystal into her needed? WAS THE TORTURE NEEDED?! NO! IT WAS EVIL AND UNCALLED FOR AND WHY WOULD YOU TAKE A JOB THAT TURNS YOU INTO THAT?! I-I called you a friend! I sent you tea... and you did those things! And you have the nerve to say you /had/ to! We all have choices Biara! At least to some degree!" Chelody's voice shouted at her.

She grimaced, her eyes opening as the last words echoed over and over in her thoughts. She nodded to herself slowly as she realized that it was true.

"We all have choices. I chose to delve into this magic and pursue this course, despite the personal costs time and again. I chose to ignore the warnings, to ignore the damage it had done to me when I had already seen what it did to my people," she said softly.

Biara fell silent for a time, staring off across the grassy fields around the shrine, watching the sunlight play on the greenery. She admired the beauty of her homeland, took in the serenity of the moment, drew in a deep breath and let it out.

"I've wasted the past several years pursuing something that will destroy me. I've ruined many things with these experiments, but the cost to myself has been the steepest price," she murmured.

She thought back to her past, to the things her father had taught her growing up. He would not have been proud of her at that moment, not knowing that she handled darkness like a plaything and that lives were ruined as a result of her study. That was something her mother would have appreciated, and it was suddenly so completely obvious what the correct path should have been that she grinned ruefully.

"Ever the stubborn child, father," She said. "Forgive me, I've made terrible mistakes."

Her eyes closed again and she simply existed in that moment. Knowing that she had made mistakes would not undo what had been done. She would need to face the foes those mistakes had caused, and lay them low before more people were injured. There was no option, and Tel'athar had not raised her to flee the consequences of her actions, but rather to face them. There would be time later to ensure that they were never repeated.

So be it. Let them come. I will stand strong, and when it is all over, I will be clean of this darkness, for I will set aside the scourge magic for good. It is nothing but death, and Quel'Thalas has seen enough of death to last an eternity. There is much yet to undo that I have wrought. 

Her mind finally at peace, the Magistrix smiled, drifting into a state of reverie for a time, the future uncertain but her course plotted.