*Along the shores of
Azshara lie the remains of various Highborne structures and pieces of
their once great empire. One of the buildings, thousands of years old,
once again glows with light as the wards on it are renewed by one who
has done such things for centuries. There, on the soft sand covered
floor of what was once a beautiful home, Malandrae sleeps fitfully, her
journal open on the ground beside her.*
It is not Zin'azshari. It is not the ruins of my home. That is the first thought that came to mind, the first relief I had when I came to this place. I had no idea that any more of our cities still existed, and when I heard the people at Druidess Smallwing's meeting speaking of such a place, I had to come and see it. I had to know if any of it survived.
It is Eldarath. I knew it from the minute I set my eyes upon it, even from a distance. Who would not recall the grand temple of Zin-malor? Who could possibly forget the thousand glowing points of magic that had illuminated the structure? The grand towers that looked down upon the land around it, bathed in magic? They were beautiful works of art, and it was a place I'd visited many times before. It is all in ruins now, a sad reminder of what once was and what will never be again.
After this weekend, I think that many would be overjoyed to look upon these ruins and see them. They would think "Here then is an example of folly, of a people who knew nothing and went into the sea where they belong." I know this because several people made comments at me, called me names and told me terrible things. They wish I wasn't here, and they don't know that I wish the same thing. I don't belong here, in this place. I belong back then, back when this city was a wonder to look upon. Sometimes I wonder why I lived through it when beautiful places like this didn't survive. By what chance did Eldre'nor and I manage to escape when so many others didn't?
I'm not sure how to face the children of the people who survived what we did. Those who fling angry words at my kind because they know what a danger we can be. They act like I'm too stupid to realize what happened. In the end, I saw what the Queen was doing, even if it was too late and my eyes were blind until the last moment. I know. That is why I accept the words they cast at me. Because they're right.
During my exploration of the ruins I was attacked by Naga. I had some very strange feelings go through my mind when I was forced to fight them. The first was that Silveria was right; you have to fight in this world, or you'll simply be killed. It is not like where I came from where safety was assured (but was it?). You have to protect yourself. I don't know if I can do it. I don't know if I can take lives with my magic. That's not what it is for!
And yet, when the Naga attacked me, I realized that I was fighting the great-children of my friends and loved ones. At least the ones who stayed with the Queen. Each one that fell was like a little piece of solace. I didn't stop them when I had the chance, but I am stopping their descendants from continuing the same destructive course. It is like time cast me forward to this place to undo the wrongs that we made.
Maybe that is the answer then? Is there such thing as fate? I don't even pretend to have the answer to that question. I don't even understand the world that I've been placed in, but I do know that I have little time to learn. I have to decide to act, instead of sitting and cowering like I've done before. I have to do SOMETHING to help. I'm thousands of years too late to stop a disaster, but the people that have claimed the world in our absence have done wonderful things, and have created beauty that I can help protect now.
Even so, I sit now in the ruins of a home and look out over the sea from the balcony and wonder if I don't belong drowned under the waves with everything I knew. These thoughts are alien to me; I'm never this sad but tonight just brought it all crashing down on my head. The comments, and then seeing this place were almost too much.
I have to believe there is a reason why my bones don't rest in the sea. I have to believe fate has a purpose for me. Maybe the Goddess herself does. I do not know, but I intend to find out. I have another chance, and this time I will do the right thing.
The home of my new friends will never be ruins like these.
It is not Zin'azshari. It is not the ruins of my home. That is the first thought that came to mind, the first relief I had when I came to this place. I had no idea that any more of our cities still existed, and when I heard the people at Druidess Smallwing's meeting speaking of such a place, I had to come and see it. I had to know if any of it survived.
It is Eldarath. I knew it from the minute I set my eyes upon it, even from a distance. Who would not recall the grand temple of Zin-malor? Who could possibly forget the thousand glowing points of magic that had illuminated the structure? The grand towers that looked down upon the land around it, bathed in magic? They were beautiful works of art, and it was a place I'd visited many times before. It is all in ruins now, a sad reminder of what once was and what will never be again.
After this weekend, I think that many would be overjoyed to look upon these ruins and see them. They would think "Here then is an example of folly, of a people who knew nothing and went into the sea where they belong." I know this because several people made comments at me, called me names and told me terrible things. They wish I wasn't here, and they don't know that I wish the same thing. I don't belong here, in this place. I belong back then, back when this city was a wonder to look upon. Sometimes I wonder why I lived through it when beautiful places like this didn't survive. By what chance did Eldre'nor and I manage to escape when so many others didn't?
I'm not sure how to face the children of the people who survived what we did. Those who fling angry words at my kind because they know what a danger we can be. They act like I'm too stupid to realize what happened. In the end, I saw what the Queen was doing, even if it was too late and my eyes were blind until the last moment. I know. That is why I accept the words they cast at me. Because they're right.
During my exploration of the ruins I was attacked by Naga. I had some very strange feelings go through my mind when I was forced to fight them. The first was that Silveria was right; you have to fight in this world, or you'll simply be killed. It is not like where I came from where safety was assured (but was it?). You have to protect yourself. I don't know if I can do it. I don't know if I can take lives with my magic. That's not what it is for!
And yet, when the Naga attacked me, I realized that I was fighting the great-children of my friends and loved ones. At least the ones who stayed with the Queen. Each one that fell was like a little piece of solace. I didn't stop them when I had the chance, but I am stopping their descendants from continuing the same destructive course. It is like time cast me forward to this place to undo the wrongs that we made.
Maybe that is the answer then? Is there such thing as fate? I don't even pretend to have the answer to that question. I don't even understand the world that I've been placed in, but I do know that I have little time to learn. I have to decide to act, instead of sitting and cowering like I've done before. I have to do SOMETHING to help. I'm thousands of years too late to stop a disaster, but the people that have claimed the world in our absence have done wonderful things, and have created beauty that I can help protect now.
Even so, I sit now in the ruins of a home and look out over the sea from the balcony and wonder if I don't belong drowned under the waves with everything I knew. These thoughts are alien to me; I'm never this sad but tonight just brought it all crashing down on my head. The comments, and then seeing this place were almost too much.
I have to believe there is a reason why my bones don't rest in the sea. I have to believe fate has a purpose for me. Maybe the Goddess herself does. I do not know, but I intend to find out. I have another chance, and this time I will do the right thing.
The home of my new friends will never be ruins like these.
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